"Marriage is a sentence,a life sentence,"I remember my husband telling me this in our initial days of courtship,and i would laugh at his sense of humour. Today,we've been married for nine whole years and there are times when I try to sit all alone and try to analyse every second of our married life. Not that I plan to do anything but at times i wonder at the type of human beings marriage can make us.
I remember we used to quarrel a lot in the beginning of our married years, that was the phase we were trying to adjust with eachother.Humans are highly adaptable beings, i mean just look at it this way, this man whom you've never seen before enters your life and claims you as his property and you don't wince about that,infact you open up evrything like he is more important than your own parents who shed their blood and sweat to bring you up.You clean his house, cook food for him, wash his clothes and smile all the time as if your life has met success you've always wanted to have.......the biggest achievement of the life time. You give your time and energy to build a home he has always dreamt of having and if you are not very careful he might accuse you for lack of love if you so much as divert your attention to your kids(after their arrival. God! Husbands are impossible at times. I retort at him then, you are like robber who has robbed my everything and after taking my everything you blame me for wearing fake jewellery.
Whatever said and done, no relation is as true as this relation. When you fall, husband will be be the first person to leap into the pit to save you from getting hurt. Husband is a person who will stay awake the whole night to allow you to sleep peacefully when you are scared about something at night. Husband is the one who will get hurt but won't hurt you ever. (Well, the tiffs and impossibilities that are free packaged gift with this thing called marriage, haha)

Coming Back Home

Fourteen years ago I bade farewell to this small town I called my village, my home. I grew up swimming in its rivers, walking on its dusty path and singing songs in the rhythm of its frenzy breeze but this same roads, rivers and the breeze robbed me of the reasons for living with it so I bade it a teary farewell when I lost my little sister along with the breaking bond of my dad and mom.
But today, after fourteen years I had to come back home, to the embrace of the world I had forsaken for all these years. As I drove on the winding path, I started feeling dizzy but it was not motion sickness, it was the feeling of euphoria, of coming back to the place I belonged and will always belong to no matter where I build my home now. I saw myself in the streams winding alongside the path I took and felt the same fear of my mother’s scolding filling my heart. In the dusty path, some kids were playing and as I gazed closely, I saw the snotty little girl who frequented on these same dusty paths some fourteen years ago. In the lengthy stretch of the road, I saw the innocence of same snotty girl which died in the reigns of the mighty hand of fate but once again taking this same path I saw that girl taking life for another time. Before long I found my eyes well up with fresh stream of tears that lay hidden in the fabric of responsibilities that had me enclosed me in its embrace. I cried silently and from the corners of my eyes, I saw my husband looking at me and as he silently drove the vehicle I remembered the journey he was taking with me and saw a glint of smile that spelled happiness. I looked at him, facing him and smiled back the same smile, the smile that assured me of a life I knew that brought him in my life. He would always tell me I would never have married him had I not been forced to leave this place and in his smile I noticed the hint of thankfulness to this place which had disowned me only to make him own me.
But whatever, it was a fresh feeling of love of coming back to my roots, to my home, back again after all these years with a new world that meant a lot more of my achievement since the day I decided to part ways with it. Today I learnt that the world I had created was a mere illusionary world of the world I had left behind and today it was like coming out of the shadowy dark cave to face the light of the real world.

The other side of me

I sat in front of my laptop, unsure of my next step when my hands had already typed Druknet.com and before long I found myself enter the chat room. Chatting in this site is always a mixture of embarrassment with the touch of naughtiness gripping in one’s heart. I hardly visit this site but after I came to know few nicks of the people whom I know I have started frequenting this website in search of my friends who don’t show up in our regular site. On this day, the upper side of my lips twitched as if going on a verbal spree but I tried to reason out against the urge to believe it. Not finding any of my usual friends I was about to click myself out of it when I saw a “hi” blinking on my screen. I could have easily ignored that message and saved myself from the embarrassment but my boredom won over me and I found myself answering back. The next query that was thrown to me was about my nick, I never knew the kind of nicks you chose for yourself mattered, I mean I’ve been calling myself by various names and never has it had anything to do with my being. But when this man( I don’t know he said he is a man) asked me about it, I felt as if somebody was trying to uproot me from the place I belonged to and I casually told him I am from eastern Bhutan. I could have easily lied and got away with that but no, I had to be truthful to this horrid two faced (or may be hundred faced) being. Then tumbled all the things we hear about the sharchops, ara thungmi (as if it is only the sharchops who wallow in the whirlpool of booze), our curries that is more of water than the vegetables, Marrying one’s own cousin, blah blah. I took that as a joke in the beginning but he kept on going with the never ending blah blahs about the people of eastern Bhutan. I gave him a dose of my anger and after much heated argument; I left my laptop fuming with anger.
I sat outside my house, cold winter wind slapping my face as if angry with me for those verbal accusations. The more I thought about that the more I loathed the idea of having gone ahead with the chat although to ignore that would have been the most sensible thing but how was I to know that it would turn to such tone. Rewinding the argument I saw myself like that same two faced being I had quarreled with. He accused me all the things as if being sharchop was life’s biggest mistake and I did the same in response to his words. Tears swelled up in my eyes acknowledging the person in me I had never imagined dwelled within me. I have always told people not to be prejudiced, that was the quality that I’ve loathed in people but after that heated discussion I felt the same in fact was a part of me too and I felt miserable. That day I cried, not because that person called me names but because he brought alive in me a kind of a person I’ve always been against.