Farewell

Today was a nostalgic moment for the Wangdicholing LSS family.For the first time, the school organized a farewell gathering for its outgoing class eight students. Speeches and songs and dances were showcased (nothing unusual!).

One advice given to the students by our Principal had all of us laughing. He said," I want you all to prove that you all are potatoes and not eggs!" Wondering what's with this egg and potato? Well, according to him students should be like potatoes, no matter how hard initially, as they go up, climbing the ladder of Education, just like the potato getting soft and mushy the more we cook them, students should become more soft- meaning more humane and disciplined. Unlike the egg, which is soft initially but as we cook them, it becomes hard. Much as silly as it sounds, there is a lot of wisdom in it. So, don't forget to be a potato! :)

Sitting in the audience watching students perform on the stage took me back to my own days as a student. I always grabbed the chance to get on the stage whenever I could. As the students moved their bodies in rhythm I felt my heart grooving to the melody from the past. But wait! back in our times, most would shake their body to more of English and Bollywood numbers. Look at the songs played today, I'm proud to see our very own Dzongkha songs being performed and enjoyed by all.

Here is few pictures I captured today form the farewell performances:

Bursting out my own frustration!

Dear God,
I know as soon as you read the first few lines of this letter, you’ll say,”hey! This is not for my department,” but I know you are the only one who’ll go on listening to my story without discarding it in the waste bin like the others would do if I choose to write this letter to them.
There are times when I really question my existence as a woman. Do I really need to take eight more lives to complete the nine lives as a human to be born as a man so that I can walk and dream shoulder to shoulder with a man?
Till date I’ve played the perfect mother and perfect wife and I’m always playing the role of perfect daughter all the time. This is one reason why I never chose to go to upgrade my academic qualification cos the it would mean compromising with my role as a mother. It’s not that I never yearned for that. Having topped from my batch from NIE, the yearning for learning has always been there inside my heart, looming like an invisible dream inside me. But I kept on telling myself,” let your children grow up, then think for yourself!”
Recently upon persuasion from my family and friends, I took a chance in the interview for the post of Vice Principal. Working in school as a teacher, I’ve always given my cent percent dedication. It gave me immense pleasure to mother the hundreds of children apart from my own kids. And when I initially put up my application for the same, I started dreaming about the changes that I can bring with the added responsibility of a manager.
But my dream turned into fear when I heard from people who had participated in the same when they told me about the placement. As much as I care for my students and my school, I would first need my own family to keep me in that sanity to work in peace.
So I thought of withdrawing but I was told that I would be black listed that means I would earn bad reputation in my organization. And like I’ve already mentioned, one day, when my kids are grown up, I want to go and study. Study for my own academic growth; after that I would have no regrets of dying.
Not wanting to risk black listing, I went for the interview. People might call me fake but in earnest honesty I say this, I went to fail in the interview. Being in the interview was a rich experience in itself. I saw my mates carrying thick books which contained information of various policies, the whole organogram of the Ministry and many such details that the panel might ask. I rushed to my place for interview after feeding my kids just to reach in time for the same.
The much feared question was asked to me by one of the panelist. “If you’ve to go away from your family after being given this VP post, would you go?”
Straight from my heart, I told them I can’t go away from my family in a polite way. As soon as I came out, my friends asked me and I told them everything that had happened inside. Hearing my declaration to this query, everybody shook their head.
“why didn’t you say you’ll go? You can always change later!” they tsked tsked looking at me. But I walked happily back home to my family. Getting the post with a lie was not an option for me. I was happy for having avoided the blacklisting and even if I was not selected, that was not an issue with me.
But I was to prolong the stress filled days as I got selected. I scrolled through the list; out of the 33 selected candidates, there were only three ladies. We were informed that placement would be given as per the merit list. I stood in number 25th and once again there arose the question of black listing if I back out.
I respect the merit based placement and I applaud the ministry for ensuring fairness. But the question comes in my mind: can’t rules be bent sometimes to suit the need of the moment? Can’t the three women be given a choice first so that they don’t have to leave their family while pursuing their career? Can’t our Heads think of such strategy to ensure that women can also rise without having to compromise everytime? Don’t we talk about women empowerment?
I’m not saying that there should be certain numbers of seats reserved for women. That would be unfair. The interview has been conducted with same platform offered for all men and women. And 30 men have made it in comparison to only 3 women.
Atleast in placement, if choice had been given to these three women, would it have made any huge difference in the lives of the remaining 30 men. Would they have thought of giving up because they have to think of keeping their family together? I don’t think so!
Since the time our results were declared, I’ve been juggling between my own stand as a woman who has a career and a mother who might have to take her three kids to some wilderness away from their father and the beam of the mother always loomed heavier. I contemplated giving up the post so that I can be in the same place with my husband so that my kids will have both the parents together.
Just when the Ministry started calling up the selected candidates in the merit wise sequence, I too received a call. It was a man who was kept as a stand by. He had heard of my ordeal and he was checking whether I was really giving up or not. In my mind’s eye, I saw that man already eyeing my position.
Whole night I thought hard about it, tossing and turning, unable to get sleep. Today I received the call and the options were all faraway from the place where my husband is working currently. Blindly, I gave my choice of a school that was spread out as choices to me. The woman in me had awoken and she told me,” men will never lift your career and they will never stop at anything to get into power. You won this post fairly, why do you want to give up?”
I listened to that voice from my brain but now I’m sitting at home, my three little kids prancing around, I’m beginning to doubt my decision,” should I pull back my placement? Should I again compromise with my role as a wife and mother and give up this?”
Dear God, there is no such thing as women empowerment happening. Had it been there in reality, don’t you think the three minorities would have been given priority? If I choose to step down, don’t you think I’m pulling a woman down from climbing her career ladder? Is it fair then?
I don’t know God, I seriously don’t know.

My Scientific Daughter

Science teaches us how every little thing that happens in the Universe has its own causes; its own reasons; and its very own results. Nothing happens without no reasons and this statement holds true if it is something that happens to my daughter.Yes, My four year old daughter whose bickering fills my ears from the early sunrise till the time she surrenders herself to the angel of sleep.

Recently, while on a trip, she puked so much that I felt very sorry for the state she was in. But as soon as she finished throwing up, in her usual perky tone, she would jab me from the backside seat and ask," Mama, can I tell you why I'm throwing up so much?"

Anything to make her feel better! So, I ask her," Why?"

"because while rinsing my mouth after brushing my teeth, the germs that came out of my teeth went into my tummy when I swallowed a little bit of water." she gives me a sheepish smile. In stating her theory, she unknowingly confessed about swallowing the tap water. I always scream at her to throw out the tap water while she plays with it, moving it all over, inside her tiny little mouth.

After that smile she continues," so you see, now the germs apa, germs ama and germs baby are all inside my tummy and they are making me puke so much." Much as I'm angered by her tap water swallowing part, it is overshadowed by that cute theory of the germs family in her tummy and I laugh. She laughs too. (At least momentarily she forgets her puking).

Yet another time, I was calling out for her to pick up her toys, which lays sprawled out all over the house. She loves cooking imaginary dishes for us and all of us in the house do entertain her by pretending to eat and actually relish her dishes. But seeing the toys on the floor makes me super mad sometimes! So I was yelling out for her to clean up, which actually turned on deaf ears.

After I had finished cleaning up all alone, she comes out of the room, having finished her Chota Bheem show and lovingly coos near my ears," Mama, I'm so sorry I didn't do good listening today. Can I tell why I didn't listen?"

"Why?" I ask not even ready to hear her answers for I'm still fuming in rage.

"Today Azhim didn't clean our house properly. So, these tiny dusts have entered my brain and it stopped me from listening to you."

I cast her a dirty look. Not bothered in anyway by my looks, she continues," Our brain controls everything we do, right mama?" she asks solemnly.I don't answer her, this girl has the knack to pass on her faults to everything but herself. But she pesters me with, "right? mamaaaa???? right?"

Finally I give in and answer,"RIGHT!"

"See, the dirt are inside my brain and controlling my body." and she says it with such conviction that even Einstein, if he had been sitting next to us, would have given it a second thought.Bah!

So, you see, my four year old daughter gets away, every time, with such explanation.

Best of all is when I kiss her and ask her," Why is your kissey so sweet?"
She pauses for some time, as if thinking very hard to find her reasons and then in her cute voice says,"My kissey is sweet because I always eat a lot of chocolates. That's why!"

Awww! She is just so cute!